Strategies to help you get more of what you want
(and less of what you don’t want)
- You become what you think about
- Get serious!
- Change the way you look at food
- Bring it On!
- Responsibility and Self-Reliance
- Your Number one Asset
- Relationships (play the game)
- What it’s Really all about
You Become what you Think About
Have you ever thought about how you think? Do you ever wonder how much your thoughts affect the quality of your life? If not, maybe it's time you did...
Perhaps the greatest mental principle ever discovered is that 'we become what we think about. Each person's outer world is a reflection of their inner thoughts and ideas. In essence what is going on outside of you is a reflection of what's going on inside you.
This extends well beyond the concept of positive thinking and attitude; it means that everything you are and everything you have - is a result of your thouahts. Even if you don't believe it's true you will still become what you think about.
What does this mean for you and me? It means that we can use this discovery to our advantage. We can literally change our lives, beginning with our thoughts. And in this small book, I will show you how to start doing it.
The first step to changing your life is to begin to accept the awesome power your thoughts have in your life. This is because everything starts with a thought. It is the starting point of everything you do. Your thoughts have the power to make you unpopular or popular, insecure or confident, negative or positive. And it all begins with realising that this is so.
The secret to getting more out of your life is to structure your thinking in such a way that it helps you. You can design your thought patterns so they help you feel confident and in control. You can structure your thinking to help you learn fast and move on opportunities in your life and career. By doing this, there is literally nothing that you cannot eventually change and improve.
This is the first of the nine strategies, and if you are willing to accept that thinking can impact your life - and become more conscious of it - then you will be able to use the next eight strategies to your distinct advantage.
In this short book, I've given you nine strategies that act as 'paradigm shifters'. Each of them will greatly enhance your life, if you choose to take them on. They will all take time and focus to incorporate into your life; and all of them are guaranteed to bring results. Each idea can be used separately or together to help you.
Just how far you go depends on how much you are willing to change your thinking. If you revolutionise your thinking, then you will have a lifestyle revolution as well.
Why do you think the majority of people never achieve very much in their lives? Is it circumstances? Is it fate? The truth is that most people fail to achieve very much because they do not take their life seriously.
It's likely you've heard the saying life is not a dress rehearsal' before. But have you ever really thought about it? How often do we do things that are only giving us mediocre results in our lives when we really want the best for ourselves? How often do we take shortcuts in our work, health or relationships when we know we could and should be doing better?
Here is a fact: each of us is given 24 hours a day to do with what we want to.
Nobody is given any more or less of this valuable resource. Yet what each of
us chooses to do with our time makes a big difference. If you choose to focus
your daily actions on improving yourself and your life, you will find your life improving. If in contrast you spend your time idly, counting the hours till you finish work or wishing that could win the lottery - then it's likely nothing in your life will change.
How seriously you take your life and your success is really up to you. Each day when the sun rises there are literally millions of other people who compete with you for all the great things life has to offer. If you do not take your work, your health, your relationships and own personal development seriously, then you will soon find yourself falling behind those who do. This is neither fair nor unfair - it's just the way the world works!
The next time you feel that life isn't giving you what you want and need, then take a look at how seriously you are treating the life you lead. Do you give 100% to your work and your life? Or do you tend to peak out at 60%? Only you will know the answer to this, but it is an important question to ask yourself.
Being more serious doesn't mean you must stop enjoying yourself or having fun. But it does require you to examine your daily and weekly efforts. In life we don't always get what we want, but usually what we deserve. The more you are willing to invest into yourself - your work, relationships, health, personal development - the more life will give you back.
Here's a great way to start practicing this idea: at the end of each week, ask yourself if you have honestly done the best you possibly could in each situation (work, relationships, health, personal development). If the answer is no, then start to think of ways you can improve your efforts the next week. Repeat this exercise each week and watch your rewards in life soar!
change the Way you. Look at Food
So many people these days are really exhausted. Ask somebody how they feel, and they'll usually say 'tired1. It seems that modern life is really wearing us all out, and we have no idea why.
While it's true that many of us are working harder than ever before, it's also important to realise the value of the food you eat.
Most of us only think about food when we are hungry, and then we usually eat whatever we 'feel like' eating. Here is great idea to immediately give you more energy: change your perception of food. Stop thinking of it in terms of how it tastes; instead focus on how it fuels your body.
In its most basic form, food is just potential raw energy. The more high quality fuel you use the greater return of energy your body has. The greater amount of energy you have, the more you can do and experience in your life.
By suggesting this idea, I am not saying you must become a health food fanatic - rather I'm suggesting you think about what you get out of the food you eat. Instead of only thinking about food when your stomach grumbles, think about it before you even start your day. Ask yourself what kind of activities you have on, and how much energy you need to complete them. Then decide what fuel would best suit your energy needs.
Of course, the best sources of high energy come from natural foods such as fresh fruits, juices and vegetables. This is because they are transformed into raw energy faster than any other types of food. But you must decide for yourself what types of food suit your energy needs the most.
Here is a little test for you: over the next week, be conscious of the energy
return you get from the foods you eat. Do not think about taste or if you're satisfied - only think about the energy they give you after you eat them.
Next, test other types of food to see if you gain better results. You will notice that some foods give you more natural energy than others.
Once you know what works for you (each person is a little different), try to incorporate more of the better quality energy foods into your diet. Do not obsess about a diet regime; rather just keep thinking to yourself 'What energy do I get from eating this?'
Bring It On!
What is the right way to look at the problems in your life? Should you get worried about them? Should you complain and condemn them in the hope that they'll go away? If you want to be agitated and stressed for the rest of your life, then maybe you could.
Or should you accept problems as a part of the 'tide of life' and go wearily about your day feeling burdened and miserable? If you want to be depressed all the time, then perhaps you should.
If neither of those ways of thinking appeals to you, here is another idea for you: whenever you are faced by a problem large or small, then look at it as personal challenge. Decide to adopt the 'Bring It On' attitude.
The 'Bring It On' attitude says
- Life isn't for wimps!
- Every challenge or problem is a chance to grow
- What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger
Each time life serves up a tough situation, you have to face it squarely and say to yourself, "Bring It On!" This may sound like a peculiar way to face your problems, but it is guaranteed to boost your chances of success. Saying these words over and over will trigger the positive, proactive, constructive thinking that you require to solve your problems and challenges. It stirs up the courage and power that is dormant inside of you.
Only you can decide what reaction you have to the events of your life. You choose if you see something as an opportunity to show your true colours, or a sign that you should just give up.
Each time you feel overwhelmed it's easy to feel like giving up, and retreating.
But the 'Bring It On1 attitude makes you feel better about your situation. Try it for yourself next time you are starting feel sorry for yourself. Straighten your shoulders, smile to yourself and say...
"Bring it On!"
Responsibility and self-Reliance
For most people, having freedom and control in our lives is very important. We all value our ability to make our own decisions and having the power to choose. Of course, what a lot of us forget is that to have freedom and control in our lives requires a high level of responsibility and self-reliance.
Often the best way to tell how 'free' you are is how much responsibility you are willing to accept in your life. Each of us is born totally dependant on other people, usually our parents. As young children, every part of our lives is decided and guided for us. We don't have to find our own food, clothing or shelter; we don't decide if we'll go to school. Everything we do and everything we are is a result of other people doing it for us.
As we grow into adults, we begin to take more and more of this responsibility on for ourselves. Some of us take responsibility quite eagerly and enjoy the freedom that comes with it. Other people however tend to try to avoid the responsibility that being an adult requires. But avoiding responsibility is simply cheating yourself.
Here are three great ways to take more responsibility:
1) Remind yourself. The best way to maintain a high level of
responsibility in your life is to continually remind yourself about it. You
can say something simple to yourself like 'this is my responsibility' or 'I
am responsible'. By doing this you trigger a deeper part of your
character and become more in-control of your life.
2) Realise that freedom equals responsibility. Most people want a high
level of freedom in their lives. Unfortunately most people forget that to
truly be free and in-control requires that you take an equal level of
responsibility. Think about when you first moved out of home: for the
first time you were 'the boss' of your life. And as a result of this new
status, you also got to be the chief cook, bottle washer and bill-payer.
Realise that by accepting responsibility for yourself and your life, you
are also enabling more freedom and choice to flow towards you.
3) Admit your mistakes. One of the fatal flaws most people have is to try
to hide their mistakes. They think that because they have 'messed up'
that they will cause trouble for themselves. Often they will try to hide
their mistakes by lying, avoiding or blaming. By doing this all they really
do is cause themselves to look foolish and untrustworthy. From this
moment on, resolve to face your mistakes and learn from them. By
admitting a mistake you instantly become more responsible.
Is there an area of your life where you could take on more responsibility? If so, then take it (bring it on) and you will suddenly feel more powerful and in-control.
Your Number One Asset
There is a lot of talk today about investments and getting ahead. In the world of finance., there is much debate about what the best investments are.
And while it is important to watch your money and plan how you shall invest it, there is a much greater investment available to you: the investment of time and effort into your own personal development The knowledge and skills you can gain in your life are your number one asset.
The people who make the greatest gains in life are those who spend time each day, week, month and year investing in their personal development. They spend time reading, learning, gaining new skills and improving themselves from the inside out.
Developing yourself mentally is much like building your muscles and becoming physically fit. If you are consistent in your approach, the results start to come. You may not gain much in the short-term but over the longer term the results are noticeable and valuable.
Many people who are keen to begin a course of personal and professional development wonder what they should study first. Here is a list of ways to start to move yourself ahead:
1) Study your language. Learn to speak, read and write correctly. Each
week try to learn a new word to add to your vocabulary. Words are
tools, and the more you have at your disposal, the more effectively you
can communicate and think.
2) Study your profession. After your language, the best way to move
yourself ahead is to study your own profession. Take time to read as
much as you can about your company, type of business, the overall
industry and the future trends. Discover the skills and 'tricks of the
trade' that best people in your industry use. By studying consistently
each year for five years, you can become an expert and move to the
top of your field.
3) Study communication & people skills. You ability to get along with
different types of people will greatly enhance your success in work, no
matter what the industry. By taking time to learn how to relate, listen
and communicate, you will find yourself more popular and more able to
get what you want from your life.
By reading this book, you are one of the precious few who have discovered the miracle of personal development. If you maintain the habit of continual reading, learning and improvement of your skills, you shall find that soon enough you are making more money, friends and gaining more freedom in your life.
Relationships (play the game)
It's a fact that 85% of your happiness in life is determined by your ability to get along well with other people. There's a saying that most of your problems in life will come on two legs and talk back. Whether we like them or not, people make the world go round. And your ability to relate, communicate and negotiate will empower you as you make your way along in the world.
Relationships are complex, frustrating and often critical to our success. Perhaps the best way to get the most out of all the relationships you have is to view them as a game. By doing this you can begin to become more skilled as a player, instead of simply bumbling along not knowing how to relate to people.
There are several powerful 'games' you can play and each of them will greatly improve your ability to get along with people.
Game # 1: The Most important Person.
Each person views the world through their own eyes. To them, the world is about them and their experiences. The average person (including you and I) spends approximately 95% of their time thinking about themselves.
For this reason, playing this game is a powerful attention grabber. Instead of being like everyone else and simply thinking of yourself as most important; think of other people as most important. Treat them with respect, admiration and courtesy. Take time listen to their ideas, their feelings, even their advice.
By doing this you will come into alignment with their deep-held belief that they are most important. You will also make a startling impression on the other person. Soon enough, the person will become so impressed with you that they will begin liking you. And once a person likes you, everything becomes easier for both parties.
Game #2: Shut up!
In this game you practice the art of saying as little as possible while holding a conversation with another person. The more you can be quiet, the more the other person will be able to talk. See how much you can not say. Use facial expressions, gestures, and short succinct answers to keep yourself out of the conversation as often as possible. When the person finishes what they are saying, ask them another question to get them talking again.
Doing this helps you build the discipline of listening. Most people are incredibly poor listeners. Most of us -if truth be told- are just waiting for our chance to talk. By playing this game, you'll soon find more and more people are keen to talk to you. They will feel like you actually care about what they have to say and will like you for it.
Game # 3: Random Acts of Kindness
This game is a powerful way to build your self-esteem and your reputation with other people. The idea is that you give people small doses of kindness -a smile, a compliment, assistance, or a gift - when they least expect it. By doing this you instantly create a bond with the other person, and they will also be more inclined to help you.
Play this game whenever you see the opportunity. The more you do it, the more you will find your network, and your success growing. If you would like to get involved in this practice in your community, you may also like to visit www.actsofkindness.org
Game # 4: .Stop Competing
Often in life we feel like we are competing for everything. We race the traffic to work, try to beat co-workers for promotions, and push our company ahead of our competitors. Sometimes this competitive spirit can work its way into our conversations and relations with other people, often without us even realising.
Do you often feel the need to tell somebody when they are wrong? Do you always have to top another person stories with you amazing anecdotes?
From now on, whenever you feel yourself 'competing' in your conversations, decide to stop it. Instead, let the other person express their opinions and stories and graciously listen. By doing this you reduce the urge the other person has to beat you at the conversation game. And you might actually make a friend...
Game # 5: Don’t take it Personally
How often do you feel angry or offended by the words, actions and thoughtlessness of others? Well here's a simple solution for all the bad feelings: stop taking things personally.
Perhaps you haven't noticed, but people do things for their own reasons, not yours. Anytime somebody does something that seems to be an attack against you, it's very likely they don't mean it to be. In fact it's likely you're not even a consideration in their mind. Most people are so consumed in their lives and their problems that they don't realise that they are causing you grief or inconvenience.
For this reason it makes sense not to get all worked up about things people do or say to you. The only person who suffers from it is you. Resolve from now on to play the game of not taking it personally - no matter what the situation or the circumstance.
What it’s Really all About
Here's a big question for you: what is life all about? You could probably debate this one for hours, but for the sake of this small book I am going to suggest a simple, powerful answer:
Life is. about feeling good!
Does that seem too shallow for you? If so, think about why you do the things you do. Why do you have a family? Why do you go to work or build your own business? Why do you exercise or eat healthily? Eventually, when it comes right down to it, we do what we do so that we can feel good.
Professional salespeople have a saying: 'people make emotional decisions, but give rational reasons'. What this means is that we always buy because we want to feel good, but we say it's because of the quality, price, value, etc.
It's exactly the same in your everyday life: you will make your choices based upon what will make you feel the best, even though you may explain it for rational reasons.
Take your time going through your life and test this out for yourself - can you think of anything you do that doesn't eventually lead to you feeling good? Even going to work, and paying your taxes makes you feel good, because it enables you to live in a nice country with a high quality of life.
So now that you know this - what does it mean for you? It means that if something isn't leading to you feeling good, then perhaps you had better stop doing it.
I am talking here about things like stress, fatigue, worry, procrastination, anger, gossip, etc. All these things may give us a small feeling of release in the short term, but eventually they lead to us feeling miserable. So the answer is to stop doing them. Stop robbing yourself of the chance to feel good!
Of course, life is also about contribution, learning, growth, love, courtesy, gratitude, spirituality and a great deal more. But all of these things eventually lead us right back to feeling good. When you look over your life, and the things you do, this simple idea is very powerful for helping you to know what you should be doing.
So, do you feel good?
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